The Death (Life) of a Salesman
Starring:
Luke Salesmaker
Mv830i-D2
1.0mm-PO
Scene 1, Act 1.
10AM: Woken up by the usual clamours of conversations and door slamming, I'm greeted by my father with his usual "It's bloody 10 already, wake up you lazy pig" and I gently greet back "hhmppgghhpppzzz"
10.12AM: More "hhmppgghhpppzzz"..
11.15AM: Takes a peek at the alarm clock and panic. But then decides I have 3 more minutes to sleep so I goes back to bed.
11.25AM: Takes a shower with eyes closed. I can tell you it's not easy. And I can also tell you that being poked in the eye with a toothbrush is not as fun as it sounds.
11.50AM:
sexy as usual, then.
12.03PM: Arrives at my workplace. I immediately settle into my routine, firstly checking myself among the cameras to first ensure that the it's all working and more importantly that I'm still sexy.
12.15PM: After the checking's done, it gets pretty boring around here. And I do think it has cause me to begin hallucinating. You see, there is a samsung big screen TV here that plays a demo cd by well, Samsung of course. Well, after one too many views of it, I'm addicted to a song... or rather to one of the group members that is singing the song. I have no idea what they're singing about or who they are, but she's CUTE!! ... I have a crush on her, it seems :) ... But then again, I have a crush on everyone...
1.03PM: After rewinding it for like the 200th time, I begin to suspect that the other workers are on to me, so I do the next best thing, got for my break of course!
1.10PM:
After what seems like eternity, I usually gets my food. Drinks somehow comes very fast. I will sit and read the newspaper for any funny stories and knowing the world, there usually is at least one case of Malaysian Idiotic Report™.
2.30PM: With usually no people around, I will thus engage in a "Why no people one ar? Saturday/Sunday/Holiday wor.." conversation with one of the staffs there with an automated response of "Yalor, this month very slow.." Then both of us will give a sad shrug and I proceed stand around, waiting for the time to do the next scheduled work.
2.45pm:
This is by far one of the most important things to do when you're a salesman. You absolutely need to pee when there is no customer around. How arkward would it be if you told one of your potential customers you need to pee? Unless you're Forrest Gump I'd say it'll be very. And just as a proof to you, bel.. here we go.. a picture of me peeing standing.
3.45pm: After more standing around, it's time to do my usual "Walk around and touch something" bid, which increases your sex appeal and also longevity.
Somehow this also makes people think you're one of the staffs and it's fun to bombard them with things they will knock their brains out with like "Oh yes, not only it'll play DVD but it also rewinds them!"
5.05PM: Another break time!
6.30PM: Another important check on the Samsung TV just to see whether it has any defects or not, we obviously cannot sell anything that is defect, could we?
My advice, don't buy Samsung TV. Just steal their demo CD's.
7.30PM: After very throughout check on the TV, it was time for some R'n'R. Work is hard you know. Sitting down for some T.V while praying that a customer would want to buy a camcorder as been a ritual practiced since the days of my grandfathers.
8.30PM: While most of the fanfare has subdued by now, I usually will get a few customers that comes to "Tengok saja.." before ending up spending more than 3000 on a camcorder. I waste almost 30 minutes to convince one customer, so you can appreciate all the hard training I placed into this one sale that I usually need. Oh,
9.45pm: I bid goodbye to everyone and go home to continue onto my next journey, usually something boring like clubbing or futsal.
Luke Salesmaker
Mv830i-D2
1.0mm-PO
Scene 1, Act 1.
10AM: Woken up by the usual clamours of conversations and door slamming, I'm greeted by my father with his usual "It's bloody 10 already, wake up you lazy pig" and I gently greet back "hhmppgghhpppzzz"
10.12AM: More "hhmppgghhpppzzz"..
11.15AM: Takes a peek at the alarm clock and panic. But then decides I have 3 more minutes to sleep so I goes back to bed.
11.25AM: Takes a shower with eyes closed. I can tell you it's not easy. And I can also tell you that being poked in the eye with a toothbrush is not as fun as it sounds.
11.50AM:
sexy as usual, then.12.03PM: Arrives at my workplace. I immediately settle into my routine, firstly checking myself among the cameras to first ensure that the it's all working and more importantly that I'm still sexy.
12.15PM: After the checking's done, it gets pretty boring around here. And I do think it has cause me to begin hallucinating. You see, there is a samsung big screen TV here that plays a demo cd by well, Samsung of course. Well, after one too many views of it, I'm addicted to a song... or rather to one of the group members that is singing the song. I have no idea what they're singing about or who they are, but she's CUTE!! ... I have a crush on her, it seems :) ... But then again, I have a crush on everyone...
1.03PM: After rewinding it for like the 200th time, I begin to suspect that the other workers are on to me, so I do the next best thing, got for my break of course!
1.10PM:
After what seems like eternity, I usually gets my food. Drinks somehow comes very fast. I will sit and read the newspaper for any funny stories and knowing the world, there usually is at least one case of Malaysian Idiotic Report™.
2.30PM: With usually no people around, I will thus engage in a "Why no people one ar? Saturday/Sunday/Holiday wor.." conversation with one of the staffs there with an automated response of "Yalor, this month very slow.." Then both of us will give a sad shrug and I proceed stand around, waiting for the time to do the next scheduled work.
2.45pm:
This is by far one of the most important things to do when you're a salesman. You absolutely need to pee when there is no customer around. How arkward would it be if you told one of your potential customers you need to pee? Unless you're Forrest Gump I'd say it'll be very. And just as a proof to you, bel.. here we go.. a picture of me peeing standing.
3.45pm: After more standing around, it's time to do my usual "Walk around and touch something" bid, which increases your sex appeal and also longevity.
Somehow this also makes people think you're one of the staffs and it's fun to bombard them with things they will knock their brains out with like "Oh yes, not only it'll play DVD but it also rewinds them!"
5.05PM: Another break time!
6.30PM: Another important check on the Samsung TV just to see whether it has any defects or not, we obviously cannot sell anything that is defect, could we?
My advice, don't buy Samsung TV. Just steal their demo CD's.
7.30PM: After very throughout check on the TV, it was time for some R'n'R. Work is hard you know. Sitting down for some T.V while praying that a customer would want to buy a camcorder as been a ritual practiced since the days of my grandfathers.
8.30PM: While most of the fanfare has subdued by now, I usually will get a few customers that comes to "Tengok saja.." before ending up spending more than 3000 on a camcorder. I waste almost 30 minutes to convince one customer, so you can appreciate all the hard training I placed into this one sale that I usually need. Oh,
9.45pm: I bid goodbye to everyone and go home to continue onto my next journey, usually something boring like clubbing or futsal.
posted by Fuzzy at
6/08/2005 07:21:00 PM
1 Comments:
All these thing called life huh? The last time you were telling everyone was about the exams & school. Now a salesman? Now wait a minute who's that goodlooking fella out there?
By
Anonymous, at 6:47 AM
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